Friday, September 22, 2006

Iraqi Laws of Physics

1) For every thing you try to do in Iraq, there is an opposite and equally compelling reason why it absolutely cannot be done within the time allotted.

2) An immobile Iraqi object will remain immobile, until such time as the American shows it what to do.

3) Within a closed system, temperature will increase proportional to the pressure applied by those of a higher rank than you.

4) For any given project involving power, either the voltage, amperage, or phase will be wrong.

5) Shipping times for equipment from the States are an exponential function based upon the total distance to be traveled measured in inches, and the total time to receipt will therefore always be at least twice that estimated.

6) “Documentation” is not a known word or concept within Middle Eastern cultures.

7) Regardless of the date selected for the start of a project involving either local nationals or TCNs, it will be a Muslim holy day

8) “Good enough” is an acceptable quality rating.

9) The weight of one’s helmet and body armor always increases proportionally to the length of time it is worn.

10) And last but not least, regardless of what’s on the menu, it’s always chicken and rice.


Blogger Pixie said...

Received some really bad news today.

Know I will be here, daily, to make sure all is well.

Mark, Keith, Lisanne (and collective) - my prayers are with you. There is light and it is not so far away. Okay?

Blessed be.

September 23, 2006 10:46 PM  
Anonymous Keith said...

"Good enough" seems to be one of the the higest ratings for my work around the house. Just below " Well, nobody will notice from a galloping horse..."

September 24, 2006 7:18 AM  

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